1 00:00:04,371 --> 00:00:07,534 Boy, seems like forever since the four of us have been out to eat. 2 00:00:07,708 --> 00:00:09,676 You know, just the guys. 3 00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:13,836 Oh, God. Yes, we get it. You have a girlfriend now. 4 00:00:14,047 --> 00:00:17,676 - A little jealous, are we? - No, I'm not jealous. 5 00:00:20,153 --> 00:00:23,714 All right, I'd kill a hobo if it would get me laid. Now, can we order? 6 00:00:23,924 --> 00:00:27,325 Oh, dear Lord, they redid the menu. 7 00:00:27,494 --> 00:00:29,223 So what? It's the same food. 8 00:00:29,396 --> 00:00:31,023 Oh, is it? Look at this. 9 00:00:31,198 --> 00:00:34,190 General Tso's Chicken is no longer listed under "specialties." 10 00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:36,199 It's now under "chicken." 11 00:00:36,570 --> 00:00:40,165 - So? - Yes, General Tso. 12 00:00:41,241 --> 00:00:44,074 Not "Tso" the chicken, "so" the question. 13 00:00:45,245 --> 00:00:49,875 - So? - So why is it no longer a specialty? 14 00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:53,577 Did the chef lose confidence in the dish or himself? 15 00:00:53,754 --> 00:00:58,088 And look over here. "Shrimp in mobster sauce." 16 00:00:58,792 --> 00:01:01,283 What is mobster sauce? 17 00:01:01,528 --> 00:01:04,190 - It's obviously a typo. - Perhaps. 18 00:01:04,364 --> 00:01:08,198 Or perhaps this restaurant's now a front for organized crime. 19 00:01:08,402 --> 00:01:10,199 For all we know, the mobster sauce... 20 00:01:10,370 --> 00:01:12,895 ...contains actual chunks of deceased mobsters. 21 00:01:13,106 --> 00:01:17,133 No, no, no. I think it just means it's the kind of sauce that mobsters like. 22 00:01:17,311 --> 00:01:20,144 It doesn't mean any of that. It's a typo. 23 00:01:20,380 --> 00:01:24,714 - You know what? Let's just get a pizza. - Good idea. We'll go to Corleone's. 24 00:01:24,885 --> 00:01:27,479 Sure, no mobsters there. 25 00:01:29,289 --> 00:01:31,257 You know, the more I think about it... 26 00:01:31,425 --> 00:01:35,885 ...the mobster sauce couldn't possibly contain chunks of mobster. 27 00:01:37,130 --> 00:01:41,294 - And why is that? - It was listed under "seafood." 28 00:01:42,269 --> 00:01:45,898 What if they were mobsters who slept with the fishes? 29 00:01:49,910 --> 00:01:53,505 Leonard, are we having a serious conversation or not? 30 00:01:54,681 --> 00:01:55,943 What the...? 31 00:02:02,122 --> 00:02:05,091 - The TV is gone. - So are our laptops. 32 00:02:05,258 --> 00:02:08,785 Oh, God. Oh, God. 33 00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:11,522 Oh, God! 34 00:02:13,700 --> 00:02:16,032 It's all right. 35 00:02:16,203 --> 00:02:18,831 They didn't take my comic books. 36 00:02:44,164 --> 00:02:47,292 They took our TV, two laptops, four external hard drives... 37 00:02:47,467 --> 00:02:51,699 ...our PS2, our PS3, our Xbox, our Xbox 360, our classic Nintendo... 38 00:02:51,872 --> 00:02:56,172 ...our Super Nintendo, our Nintendo 64, and our Wii. 39 00:02:56,343 --> 00:02:58,208 We like games. 40 00:02:58,378 --> 00:03:02,576 Right, games. They took "Halo 1," "Halo 2," "Halo 3," "Call of Duty 1," "Call of Duty 2"... 41 00:03:02,749 --> 00:03:04,740 ..."Call of Duty 3," "Rock Band"... 42 00:03:04,918 --> 00:03:08,479 ..."Final Fantasy I" through "IX," "The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time"... 43 00:03:08,655 --> 00:03:12,250 ..."The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess," "Super Mario Bros." 44 00:03:12,426 --> 00:03:15,259 ..."Mario & Sonic at the Winter Olympics"... 45 00:03:17,264 --> 00:03:19,198 ...and "Ms. Pac-Man." 46 00:03:21,401 --> 00:03:23,869 Assorted video games. 47 00:03:24,438 --> 00:03:26,668 When does the CSI team get here? 48 00:03:28,008 --> 00:03:30,738 - What? - In anticipation of their arrival... 49 00:03:30,911 --> 00:03:32,708 ...I've bagged some evidence. 50 00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:35,712 One of the thieves had the audacity to quench his thirst... 51 00:03:35,882 --> 00:03:39,374 ...while ransacking our home. You should be able to pull prints off this. 52 00:03:39,553 --> 00:03:43,614 Here are my prints so you can rule me out as a suspect. 53 00:03:43,790 --> 00:03:45,553 - What about me? - I'm sorry, Leonard... 54 00:03:45,726 --> 00:03:50,026 ...it's too early to discount the possibility of this being an inside job. 55 00:03:50,197 --> 00:03:53,894 Would I be completely out of line to ask you to shoot him? 56 00:03:54,101 --> 00:03:57,264 I'd be happy to put him under a 72-hour psychiatric hold. 57 00:03:58,739 --> 00:04:02,038 I'm not crazy. My mother had me tested. 58 00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:05,609 We're done. Call this number, and we'll fax you a copy of the report. 59 00:04:05,779 --> 00:04:07,872 You can submit it to your insurance company. 60 00:04:08,048 --> 00:04:11,313 I'm sorry, that's the end of your inquiry? 61 00:04:11,485 --> 00:04:14,613 Do you have any more information that might be relevant? 62 00:04:14,788 --> 00:04:17,382 Goodness. Where do I begin? For instance, my laptop... 63 00:04:17,557 --> 00:04:20,754 ...contained four out of the five gedanken experiments necessary... 64 00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:23,088 ...for a restatement of the quantum measurement problem. 65 00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:24,662 How's that going to help them? 66 00:04:24,831 --> 00:04:26,992 They could monitor scientific publications... 67 00:04:27,167 --> 00:04:30,659 ...and see if anyone posts such a restatement in the next couple of months. 68 00:04:30,837 --> 00:04:34,671 If so, the authors are most likely in possession of my stolen laptop. 69 00:04:35,809 --> 00:04:38,073 Good night, fellas. 70 00:04:38,245 --> 00:04:40,839 Come on, Bochco. 71 00:04:50,457 --> 00:04:53,483 What are we supposed to do now? 72 00:04:53,660 --> 00:04:55,525 The only thing we can do: 73 00:04:55,695 --> 00:04:58,186 Watch TV on our phones until the criminals return... 74 00:04:58,365 --> 00:05:00,424 ...and bludgeon us to death in our sleep. 75 00:05:01,201 --> 00:05:03,635 Does that mean you've ruled me out as a suspect? 76 00:05:03,804 --> 00:05:05,362 Oh, how I wish I could. 77 00:05:58,158 --> 00:06:01,389 I do not have to urinate. 78 00:06:04,164 --> 00:06:07,998 I am the master of my own bladder. 79 00:06:10,070 --> 00:06:12,197 Drat. 80 00:06:14,608 --> 00:06:17,543 I can't believe it. If I hadn't been working the dinner shift... 81 00:06:17,711 --> 00:06:19,679 ...I would've run right into the robbers. 82 00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:22,075 Hey, there's no reason for you to be scared. 83 00:06:22,249 --> 00:06:26,709 I'm not scared. I would've gone all Nebraska on their asses. 84 00:06:28,688 --> 00:06:29,780 Leonard and Penny. Leonard and Penny. 85 00:06:29,956 --> 00:06:33,221 - Leonard and Penny. - Hand me the bat. 86 00:06:36,429 --> 00:06:38,522 We just had a major crime in the building... 87 00:06:38,698 --> 00:06:42,190 ...and you open the door without asking who it is? 88 00:06:42,369 --> 00:06:44,303 It won't happen again. What's up? 89 00:06:44,471 --> 00:06:48,100 Nothing. Just wanted to see if you were both okay. 90 00:06:48,308 --> 00:06:50,742 We're fine, Sheldon. 91 00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:52,742 All right, then. 92 00:06:52,913 --> 00:06:55,746 - Good night. - Good night. 93 00:06:57,050 --> 00:06:59,541 - Well, that was weird. Even for him. - Mm. 94 00:07:00,987 --> 00:07:04,787 Leonard and Penny. Leonard and Penny. Leonard and Penny. 95 00:07:05,659 --> 00:07:08,321 Who is it? 96 00:07:08,495 --> 00:07:11,430 Sheldon. Sheldon Cooper. 97 00:07:11,631 --> 00:07:15,123 - Yes? - May I come in? 98 00:07:16,503 --> 00:07:18,403 Yeah. 99 00:07:26,313 --> 00:07:28,941 I see you're drinking wine. 100 00:07:29,649 --> 00:07:32,174 Yes, we are. And we're about to go to bed. 101 00:07:32,819 --> 00:07:34,616 Uh-huh. 102 00:07:35,522 --> 00:07:38,355 Sheldon, do you wanna sleep here tonight? 103 00:07:38,525 --> 00:07:39,958 As small as Leonard is... 104 00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:43,687 ...I don't think the two of you would be comfortable on the couch. 105 00:07:44,698 --> 00:07:47,189 - So, what do you want? - It's not what I want. 106 00:07:47,367 --> 00:07:49,961 It's what evolution wants. Human beings are primates. 107 00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:54,197 Primates have evolved to live in groups both for protection and support. 108 00:07:54,941 --> 00:07:57,603 But you don't like other people. 109 00:07:57,777 --> 00:07:59,938 I do tonight. 110 00:08:00,880 --> 00:08:03,280 It's scary over there. 111 00:08:03,850 --> 00:08:06,648 It's getting scary here too. 112 00:08:13,226 --> 00:08:14,784 Um... 113 00:08:14,961 --> 00:08:17,293 "Three Little Kittens"? 114 00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:21,460 "Three Little Pigs"? 115 00:08:24,304 --> 00:08:26,329 God, I don't know. 116 00:08:26,506 --> 00:08:27,973 Star Wars? 117 00:08:29,676 --> 00:08:31,837 Did we win? Can we go to bed? 118 00:08:32,045 --> 00:08:34,070 Good Lord, I could not have made this easier. 119 00:08:34,247 --> 00:08:39,879 A hydrogen atom, H, plus pigs minus P, "higs." 120 00:08:40,053 --> 00:08:43,853 Bow, General Zod trapped in the Phantom Zone... 121 00:08:45,091 --> 00:08:46,718 ..."bow-zone." 122 00:08:46,893 --> 00:08:50,761 Pear, tickle, "pear-tickle." 123 00:08:53,266 --> 00:08:57,032 "Higgs boson particle." How could you not get that? 124 00:08:57,203 --> 00:09:00,536 He's right, Penny. It's all there. 125 00:09:01,274 --> 00:09:04,243 Look, Sheldon, sweetie, I know you're feeling insecure... 126 00:09:04,411 --> 00:09:07,608 - ...but we've really gotta go to sleep. - All right. 127 00:09:07,781 --> 00:09:10,409 I'll take the first watch and wake you at 0400. 128 00:09:10,617 --> 00:09:13,450 - Great. Good night. - Wait, wait. What's 0400? 129 00:09:13,620 --> 00:09:15,850 - Four a.m. - That's, like, in 45 minutes. 130 00:09:16,022 --> 00:09:18,547 Just keep walking. 131 00:09:36,709 --> 00:09:40,042 - It's quiet out there. - Maybe a little too quiet. 132 00:09:40,213 --> 00:09:43,307 - Where are you going? - Just gonna take a look around outside. 133 00:09:43,483 --> 00:09:45,815 Bad idea. 134 00:09:47,787 --> 00:09:49,778 No, Jim, don't open the door. 135 00:09:49,956 --> 00:09:52,424 Listen to her, Jim. 136 00:09:55,328 --> 00:09:57,091 Don't worry. There's no one out there. 137 00:10:08,475 --> 00:10:11,808 Leonard and Penny. Leonard and Penny. Leonard and Penny. 138 00:10:12,745 --> 00:10:15,270 Who is it? 139 00:10:19,285 --> 00:10:23,187 All right. We've got a titanium deadbolt and a reinforced jam controlled by... 140 00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:25,950 ...a state-of-the-art electronic access system. 141 00:10:26,126 --> 00:10:28,492 - What if they cut the power? - There's a 200-watt... 142 00:10:28,661 --> 00:10:31,960 - ...uninterruptible backup power supply. - If someone steals my keys? 143 00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:34,692 There are independent voice and fingerprint scanners. 144 00:10:34,868 --> 00:10:37,132 What if somebody kidnaps me, records my voice... 145 00:10:37,303 --> 00:10:39,362 ...and then cuts off my thumb? 146 00:10:40,306 --> 00:10:43,036 I'll send them a basket of muffins. 147 00:10:43,977 --> 00:10:48,641 Now, inside we've got motion detectors, infrared sensors... 148 00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:51,340 ...and cameras connected to a server... 149 00:10:51,518 --> 00:10:54,316 ...running state-of-the-art facial-recognition software. 150 00:10:54,487 --> 00:10:56,182 Where did you get all this stuff? 151 00:10:56,356 --> 00:10:59,018 I got a buddy over at the Department of Defense. 152 00:10:59,192 --> 00:11:03,686 - He just gave it to you? - I'm sure he would've if I'd asked. 153 00:11:03,863 --> 00:11:06,991 Ironically, their security isn't all that good. 154 00:11:08,001 --> 00:11:09,127 Raj, your car is blocking me. 155 00:11:10,703 --> 00:11:12,068 Intruder alert. Intruder alert. 156 00:11:12,238 --> 00:11:13,330 - Intruder alert. - What the hell? 157 00:11:13,506 --> 00:11:15,838 - Sorry, let me help you. - Intruder alert. 158 00:11:16,009 --> 00:11:20,503 Wonderful security system if we're attacked by a school of tuna. 159 00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:23,012 Don't worry, the net's gonna be electrified. 160 00:11:23,183 --> 00:11:26,516 Picture her on the floor, spasming uncontrollably. 161 00:11:28,188 --> 00:11:30,349 Better. 162 00:11:31,858 --> 00:11:33,849 Sheldon's journal. 163 00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:38,896 Security system In place. However, sleep continues to elude me. 164 00:11:39,065 --> 00:11:42,865 I've seen the underbelly of Pasadena... 165 00:11:43,036 --> 00:11:46,369 ...this so-called City of Roses... 166 00:11:46,539 --> 00:11:51,033 ...and It haunts me. Ah! The Injustice. 167 00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:56,706 I lie here awake, tormented, while out there, evil lurks... 168 00:11:56,883 --> 00:12:01,547 ...probably playing "Donkey Kong" on my classic Nintendo. 169 00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:34,246 Oh, dear. 170 00:12:36,456 --> 00:12:39,914 I am the master of my own bladder. 171 00:12:55,975 --> 00:12:59,308 Leonard and Penny. Leonard and Penny. Leonard and Penny. 172 00:12:59,479 --> 00:13:00,639 Oh, my... 173 00:13:00,813 --> 00:13:03,611 God, Sheldon. 174 00:13:06,419 --> 00:13:09,513 What the hell are you doing out there? 175 00:13:11,491 --> 00:13:13,459 I heard a noise. 176 00:13:15,028 --> 00:13:18,156 It was us. We knocked over a lamp. 177 00:13:18,331 --> 00:13:21,027 - Why would you knock over a lamp? - We were gonna... 178 00:13:21,200 --> 00:13:25,296 He doesn't need to know what we were doing, Leonard. 179 00:13:25,471 --> 00:13:26,961 Oh. 180 00:13:27,974 --> 00:13:31,307 No, she's right. I don't need to know what you were doing. 181 00:13:31,477 --> 00:13:36,141 - Carry on. - What are you doing? Use the door. 182 00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:38,477 Good thinking. 183 00:13:38,651 --> 00:13:42,348 Hey, perhaps I'll check the perimeter and make some warm milk. 184 00:13:42,522 --> 00:13:44,490 Great. You do that. 185 00:13:44,657 --> 00:13:47,649 Would you like me to bring you some warm milk? 186 00:13:47,827 --> 00:13:49,488 I'm lactose intolerant. 187 00:13:49,662 --> 00:13:54,497 And you don't wish to alarm me with any more loud noises. Very thoughtful. 188 00:13:54,667 --> 00:13:57,363 - Warm milk, Penny? - No, thanks. 189 00:13:57,870 --> 00:14:02,204 Fine. Good night to you, sir. Miss. 190 00:14:05,211 --> 00:14:08,703 - Sorry about that. - What can you do? 191 00:14:10,917 --> 00:14:13,181 Intruder alert. Intruder alert. Intruder alert. 192 00:14:26,032 --> 00:14:28,364 Looks like Wolowitz got the net electrified. 193 00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:32,497 - Sheldon, are you okay? - I'm fine. 194 00:14:33,373 --> 00:14:37,002 Though I'm no longer the master of my own bladder. 195 00:14:41,080 --> 00:14:44,709 My new computer came with Windows 7. 196 00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:49,916 Windows 7 is much more user-friendly than Windows Vista. 197 00:14:50,089 --> 00:14:52,080 I don't like that. 198 00:14:55,595 --> 00:14:59,759 Don't you think looking for a new city to live in is a bit of an overreaction? 199 00:14:59,932 --> 00:15:01,957 Our apartment was broken into. 200 00:15:02,135 --> 00:15:04,228 Our security system tried to kill me. 201 00:15:04,404 --> 00:15:09,103 And as a result, I'm leaving Pasadena forever. Tell me how that's overreacting. 202 00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:13,143 Come on, Sheldon. You can't move. Don't you need to stay in one place... 203 00:15:13,312 --> 00:15:16,770 ...so the mother ship can find you when it returns? 204 00:15:17,316 --> 00:15:19,978 Oh, if that were only true. 205 00:15:20,153 --> 00:15:23,247 Unfortunately, as I'm earthbound for the foreseeable future... 206 00:15:23,423 --> 00:15:26,085 ...I need to find a location that's more hospitable... 207 00:15:26,259 --> 00:15:30,753 ...than the mean streets of Pasadena. Like Enid, Oklahoma. 208 00:15:31,597 --> 00:15:35,465 Low crime rate, and high-speed Internet connectivity... 209 00:15:35,635 --> 00:15:38,798 ...but no model-train shops. 210 00:15:39,972 --> 00:15:42,805 Sorry, Enid. 211 00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:47,102 Is he quitting his job at the university? 212 00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:49,111 Oh, no. He's gonna telecommute. 213 00:15:49,282 --> 00:15:51,842 Everybody's really excited about it. 214 00:15:52,485 --> 00:15:56,012 All right. Boone, North Carolina. 215 00:15:56,189 --> 00:15:59,488 "Every summer since 1952, Boone has hosted... 216 00:15:59,659 --> 00:16:02,651 ...an outdoor amphitheater portrayal of the life and times... 217 00:16:02,829 --> 00:16:06,697 ...of its namesake: Danel Boone." 218 00:16:06,866 --> 00:16:10,495 That sounds like something that would attract the wrong crowd. 219 00:16:12,705 --> 00:16:16,300 - Penny, you're from Nebraska, correct? - Born and raised. 220 00:16:21,814 --> 00:16:26,308 It will take me a few days to get settled. After I do, I will e-mail you... 221 00:16:26,486 --> 00:16:29,148 ...detailed PDFs containing diagrams and instructions... 222 00:16:29,322 --> 00:16:32,485 ...that will guide you through packing and shipping my possessions... 223 00:16:32,658 --> 00:16:35,149 ...to Bozeman, Montana. 224 00:16:35,361 --> 00:16:37,989 In the meantime, please forward my mail. 225 00:16:38,164 --> 00:16:42,157 Anyplace specific, or just the Bozeman, Montana loony bin? 226 00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:46,563 I sense you're making a joke, but Bozeman does have... 227 00:16:46,739 --> 00:16:50,505 ...a comedy club called the Loony Bin, so do not forward my mail there. 228 00:16:50,710 --> 00:16:55,511 Oh, come on. So you were the victim of a crime. That's part of life. 229 00:16:55,681 --> 00:16:58,343 When my great-grandfather first came to this country... 230 00:16:58,518 --> 00:17:02,045 ...he put all his hopes and dreams into this little butcher shop... 231 00:17:02,221 --> 00:17:05,588 ...he ran on the Lower East Side of New York. You know what happened? 232 00:17:05,758 --> 00:17:08,022 Every customer who walked into that butcher shop... 233 00:17:08,194 --> 00:17:09,593 ...and asked for a pound of liver... 234 00:17:10,930 --> 00:17:11,988 ...got ripped off. 235 00:17:13,766 --> 00:17:18,533 But those people moved on, and so should you. 236 00:17:18,738 --> 00:17:22,367 I am moving on. I'm going to be a Bozite. 237 00:17:22,575 --> 00:17:24,440 They call themselves Bozites? 238 00:17:24,677 --> 00:17:28,545 They should. It's one of the first things I plan to bring up upon arrival. 239 00:17:29,248 --> 00:17:32,411 Sheldon, I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm gonna miss you. 240 00:17:32,585 --> 00:17:36,715 Please, Penny. As you know, I'm not comfortable with prolonged goodbyes... 241 00:17:36,889 --> 00:17:41,383 ...and maudlin displays of emotion, so I've prepared a short video. 242 00:17:44,564 --> 00:17:49,092 Greetings. As you know, I'm not comfortable with prolonged goodbyes... 243 00:17:49,268 --> 00:17:53,432 ...and maudlin displays of emotion, so I've prepared this short video. 244 00:17:53,606 --> 00:17:59,101 The four of you are three of my closest friends and one treasured acquaintance. 245 00:18:03,082 --> 00:18:06,483 Though I cannot state categorically that my life will be diminished... 246 00:18:06,719 --> 00:18:11,918 ...by not having you in it, I am comfortable If you choose to believe that. 247 00:18:13,259 --> 00:18:17,093 Since you intend to remain In this lawless metropolitan area... 248 00:18:17,263 --> 00:18:20,926 ...statistics suggest that you will succumb to tragic and gruesome ends... 249 00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:24,627 ...before we meet again. Live long and prosper. 250 00:18:27,273 --> 00:18:29,468 Sheldon, that's so... 251 00:18:31,944 --> 00:18:36,506 You might wanna lock the door behind me. This isn't Bozeman. 252 00:18:40,519 --> 00:18:44,956 How the hell do I know who's the friend and who's the acquaintance? 253 00:18:49,462 --> 00:18:53,193 That is a bracing cold. An invigorating cold. 254 00:18:53,366 --> 00:18:56,164 Lord, is it cold. 255 00:18:57,503 --> 00:18:59,471 Help you with your bag, sir? 256 00:18:59,672 --> 00:19:02,163 Thank you, fellow Bozite. 257 00:19:02,341 --> 00:19:04,866 And may I say, you are the living embodiment... 258 00:19:05,044 --> 00:19:09,481 ...of all the promises made by our lovely town's chamber of commerce. 259 00:19:13,486 --> 00:19:17,547 Wait. 260 00:19:18,491 --> 00:19:20,322 Excuse me! 261 00:19:30,069 --> 00:19:34,005 One ticket to Pasadena, California, please. 262 00:19:42,648 --> 00:19:45,048 Hey, look who's back. 263 00:19:45,217 --> 00:19:49,517 Interesting. The acquaintance is the first to greet me.